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- FMePlease Concept : A story can begin anyway you like. Feel free to share your experience, results, feelings and anything else you would like to add.
- Content: Post your story about how you tried to get laid. The 'Funny Sex Story' category can be used for random sex stories you have. Also read over your story, try avoiding spelling mistakes, and don't make it too long.
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Today I realized the last time I had sex was 4 years ago.

#705
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You are a genius! (1) - You need help! (30)

Mar 5, 2010 06:48 PM - Desperate - by H1N1

I spent valentines day with a bottle of Jack and my right hand.

#617
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You are a genius! (15) - You need help! (19)

Feb 15, 2010 03:23 PM - Desperate - by Keshaman

I was at a club and saw this smoking hot girl just hanging out by herself on a corner. I came up to her, said a couple of words and she immediately started making out with me. I started grabbing her and touching her all over the place and was happy because I Knew I was going to get lucky. Then she stopped, walked to the bar for a second, and her boyfriend showed up and took her away. Then I saw her making out with another random dude 10 minutes later. fmp

#494
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You are a genius! (3) - You need help! (28)

Jan 25, 2010 07:25 AM - Strangers - by Stranger

My roommate really pisses me off. She eats all of my food and makes me clean her stuff. So I make my bf jizz in her conditioner bottle. Ever wonder why your hair smells funny? It's full of protein. FMP.

#413
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You are a genius! (26) - You need help! (4)

Jan 11, 2010 11:53 PM - Miscellaneous - by angry girl from room 85

All I have to do to get some is go to the club and make sure everyone watches me get out of my Lamborghini. As soon as I get in the club 4 or 5 girls crowd around me and we usually end up doing it in the VIP room or back at my place. fmp

#479
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You are a genius! (20) - You need help! (21)

Jan 22, 2010 03:57 PM - Money - by cheap

I was with this girl and we were about to get it on. She said although she was on birth control she couldn't have sex with me unless I had a condom, which I didn't. I desperately looked around for something and found saran wrap. I told her it would work just as well, and I guess she was so horny she went with it. I turned off the lights and took the saran wrap off, she never noticed the difference. fmp

#448
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You are a genius! (14) - You need help! (32)

Jan 17, 2010 12:31 AM - Funny Sex Story - by wrapper

I haven't had sex in 10 months so I dressed up as the sluttiest pirate for Halloween and told everyone that they can have my booty. As I was about to leave with a random stranger, I got my period. FMP.

#50
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You are a genius! (6) - You need help! (48)

Nov 3, 2009 10:43 AM - Desperate - by yohoho

I had been feeling bad lately and my bf and I didn't do it for a long time. Then I got my period so we couldn't don it again, them I had to travel for business so we didn't do it again and finally when I came back I had a urinary infection and it hurt when we tried it. We were both frustrated so I decided to let him do anal. I loved it. Fmp

#638
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You are a genius! (32) - You need help! (3)

Feb 20, 2010 12:07 PM - Couples - by Butt

I was at this party a few days ago and I walked into a room where this guy and girl were going at it. The guy for some reason stopped and left the room. The girl looked at me and said "well you gonna keep going?" I don't know if she thought I was him or just wanted to keep going, so I took my pants off and went at it. A few minutes later the guy came back and he said "my bad i got the wrong room" and never came back. FMP

#247
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You are a genius! (51) - You need help! (1)

Dec 16, 2009 03:31 PM - Strangers - by Ninja

Today I moved in with my girlfriend. I gave her my credit card and told her to use it for groceries and to treat herself to something special. When I got my credit card bill the next month, it was over $13000. Apparently, $12000 worth of purses is something special. FMP.

#392
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You are a genius! (4) - You need help! (27)

Jan 9, 2010 05:44 PM - Miscellaneous - by Whatever

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