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We've added a new category, 'interrupted' for those of you who get interrupted every time you want to get it on!!


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In the middle of doing this random girl I noticed a pimple on her back and decide to pop it. It turns out to be a huge zit and she didn't even finish me off.

#66
1 Comments

You are a genius! (5) - You need help! (89)

Nov 11, 2009 01:33 AM - Strangers - by Clearasil

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Today, I decided to go tanning naked on my deck (i live in an elevated area so i didn't think anything of it) and took a nap. i woke up just in time to see the man on the electric pole next to me finish and jizz in the street. FMP.

#65
0 Comments

You are a genius! (13) - You need help! (60)

Nov 10, 2009 11:59 PM - Strangers - by embarassed

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My coworkers always wonder why I have sticky hands. I tell them I eat a lot of candy, but in reality I take pictures of all the hot girls that go in the store (clothing store) and whack it in the bathroom every couple of hours. I dont like washing my hands. FMP

#64
2 Comments

You are a genius! (8) - You need help! (276)

Nov 10, 2009 08:28 PM - Miscellaneous - by sticky fingers

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I have five fleshlights, one for every year that I haven't gotten laid.

#63
0 Comments

You are a genius! (16) - You need help! (133)

Nov 10, 2009 01:13 AM - Desperate - by Noname

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Today I came home as a surprise from serving overseas. I stopped by a lingerie shop, a florist, a jeweler, and a bakery on my way home. When I got home we had the best sex ever. That is the golden equation. Lingerie, flowers, earrings, and cupcakes. FMP.

#62
0 Comments

You are a genius! (109) - You need help! (9)

Nov 9, 2009 11:04 PM - Couples - by Sarge

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I was dumped and pretty depressed so my room mates took me to a club where this one drunk girl willingly went home with me. She kept telling me to "lean back", and I assumed it was to adjust the angle of my dick. She really meant lean back cause she sharted all over my chest. FMP.

#61
0 Comments

You are a genius! (5) - You need help! (60)

Nov 9, 2009 09:08 PM - Friends - by imfingdisgusted

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My first time, I accidentally sucked on her nipples so hard that they started bleeding. FMP.

#60
0 Comments

You are a genius! (8) - You need help! (53)

Nov 9, 2009 05:57 PM - Funny Sex Story - by Bloody Nips

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Today, on a dare, I told this chick at a bar that I was well hung porn star who knew all the moves. She went home with me and put out after one drink. FMP.

#59
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You are a genius! (59) - You need help! (8)

Nov 7, 2009 10:41 PM - Lying - by master

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